My "adopted daughter" D.N. sent this joke to me! D. was quite young when we moved to a little town, many years ago. She adopted my husband and I, and we adopted her! I believe she even gave us adoption papers when she was little! To this day, she calls us on our birthdays, and sends e-mails! Thanks for the joke! Love ya honey!
I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dog and was in line to
check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Duh!
I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting the
Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in
both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head. I went on and on with the
bogus diet story and she was totally buying it.
I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works
is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.
Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was
that why I ended up in the hospital? I said no.....I'd been sitting in the
street licking my paws when a car hit me.
I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door....